Okay, I’m going to get really real with you today. We all go through this time in our lives where we realize the amount of friends we have isn’t really what’s important – it’s the friendship that we share with those friends that should be valued. It can be difficult to tell the difference between the people we should keep around and the people we should cut ties with… especially if they’ve been a part of your life for many years. That’s why I’ve come up with 5 SIMPLE signs someone shouldn’t be in your life!
FYI, I like to consider myself a positive person who strives to post only positive content here, but I felt this post was necessary. Sometimes we just need some guidance and a little push, so get ready to dispose of the negative and hold tight to the good…
- The conversation is always one sided | In many cases opposites do attract and perhaps that’s how you and this person became friends. They’re likely loud, outgoing, and love to be the center of attention, whereas, you’re a little more on the quiet side. There’s totally nothing wrong with being more reserved, but if a friend is taking advantage of that by not taking a moment to ask you what’s new in your life, then there’s something wrong with that picture. Every time you make plans to hang out, it shouldn’t feel like you’re giving a free therapy session. Have a friend like this but don’t want to cut ties with them just yet? Try being a little more outspoken for once. If something is on your mind or you had a really great day at work, let them know… see how they react. That may be all it takes to get them to realize you also would like to talk about your day.
- Different priorities | I think this is the most common sign… especially for people our age. Being in your twenties and having friends is a weird experience. We often go through a time where we realize some of our longest friends have different priorities than we do. Perhaps we’re focused on our careers and just fine with spending our Friday nights in binge watching Gossip Girl, whereas our friends are begging us to go out Friday and Saturday night every weekend! Whatever your preference is, there’s nothing wrong with it… your twenties are exactly when you’ll find yourself in-between party girl and old lady. 😉 Unfortunately though, some of our friends won’t let it go and the peer pressure of going out followed by spending the rest of our weekend hungover gets to us. But before it gets to that point, stand up for yourself, say NO (with an occasional yes… we all need a drink every now and then)! These types of friends are usually the easiest to cut ties with – it just sort of happens naturally. It’s okay though… it’s all a part of growing up. New friends with same priorities as you will take their place and make your life much fuller and happier.
- You don’t laugh enough | Some of my absolute favorite memories include laughing hysterically with my sister and closest friends. I often don’t even remember what we were laughing about, but it doesn’t really matter… what matters is that you feel that emotion of happiness and joy when you are with them. I get it, everyone has bad times and crying with our girlfriends is important, too… but make sure laughter outweighs those debbie downer moments. You want to surround yourself with people who bring you up!
- They “think” they’re better than you | Unfortunately, there’s this thing called jealousy. Unfortunately, many people experience it… even you and I. That doesn’t mean it’s okay for your friends to bring you down because they envy you and your life. Don’t let them talk down to your accomplishments and put theirs on a pedestal. Trust me, they’re only doing it because they’re jealous. Good friends celebrate your accomplishments with you and push you to go further. They support you during good, bad, and messy times. Don’t forget that!
- You avoid hanging out with them | It is possible to have those friends that aren’t horrible, but they still just don’t feel worthy of your time. I know it sounds terrible, but maybe your personalities don’t click or maybe there’s no real specific reason at all… you just always find yourself coming up with excuses not to hang out. That’s okay! Well, it’s not okay to keep giving them bullshit excuses for not being able to hang out, but it is okay that you feel that way. This could also go vice versa. Getting the vibe someone is avoid hanging out with you or tired of hearing excuse after excuse? I recommend just to stop asking them. Doesn’t mean they won’t come around… they could just be seriously busy. If not, then the friendship wasn’t worth it anyway!
Remember, you deserve to be happy. You deserve to have thee best friends – one’s who will encourage you, inspire you, celebrate you, see you, cry with you, but laugh more with you. Don’t accept anything less than people who make your life fuller and happier.
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Call to Action:
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